molly ofgeographyMay 29, 20184 minfirst class is honestly the best argument for entering into an income-based marriageyesterday, on my flight back to chicago from atlanta, i was mysteriously bumped to first class, for no reason at all that i could ascerta...
molly ofgeographyAug 31, 20177 minat least one family has a pretty weird vacation video fo me in the bahamasyou know, there are few things in this world that i am unequivocally sure of. what adult life has taught me so far is i don’t know anythi...
molly ofgeographyJul 22, 20178 minThere's Significantly More Milk In This Story About Teenage Drinking Than You're Expectingi wasn’t cool in high school. i’m sure that’s not surprising to any of you. i mean, i was okay? i had friends. people liked me. but i was...
molly ofgeographyJul 1, 20177 minTHEIR TEETH, BUDDY!!!; Or, I Respect Sharks' Right To Live But They Should Stay TF Away From Mewhen i was A Teen, i went to fiji for like ... 5 weeks. my stepfather paid for the trip as a high school graduation present, and it was a...
molly ofgeographyJun 3, 20179 minRoses Are Red, Carnations Are Pink, This Was A Mistake, Oh God, This Was A Terrible Mistakeas a high school freshman, i was in love with a senior boy. his name was something like, but not exactly, harry. my high school did have ...
molly ofgeographyMar 7, 20177 minYou Think They’re Normal But Your Parents Could Be Hiring Hitmen Under Your VERY NOSEuntil the fourth grade, i lived with my dad, brother and sister in gentle suburban massachusetts where i could ride my bike to school. my...
molly ofgeographyFeb 12, 20176 minWASPs Don’t Talk About Their Problemsgrowing up, for the most part, i really liked school and didn’t mind getting up in the morning to attend it. which is not to say that sch...
molly ofgeographyNov 16, 20164 minan open letter to my next-door neighbor: i will never forgive and i will never forgetdear neighbor, who, for the purposes of this letter, will be named todd, listen. i know i eat a lot of takeout. maybe, arguably, i eat "t...
molly ofgeographyJun 26, 20165 minSWITZERLAND!!!!!day 1 look it's fine or whatever but someone needs to track down jetlag and punch it right in the face. i can't handle it. i consider mys...
molly ofgeographyMay 28, 20163 minThe Most Beautiful Man In The World, Who Lives In My Building & Only Sees Me When I Look Disgustingsome people find love! and some people are just trash monsters forever. The Most Beautiful Man In The World lives in my building. i don’t...
molly ofgeographyJan 26, 20164 minthe time i walked in on a robbery and tried to buy some winei really love wine. the thing you have to know about me is that fundamentally, to my core, the only thing i really want out of life is to...
molly ofgeographyNov 16, 20153 minthe time i was a DONUT GODbelieve it or not, "trashbag" is a compliment. OKAY SO THE THING ABOUT TRASHBAG DONUTS IS: i worked at a camp for kids the summer that I w...
molly ofgeographyOct 16, 20155 minthe time my highschool boyf and i got stuck on a roofcontrary to what i feel like might be popular belief, i didn’t get up to too many hijinks in high school. i mean, i was in our version of...
molly ofgeographyAug 2, 20154 minthe time i conquered an oven and almost killed myself with coffeei have always had a somewhat tenuous relationship with fire. when i was in argentina i did a homestay and my housemom, MonMons (real name...
molly ofgeographyMay 19, 20155 minthe time i got stuck on a ski lift and almost ruined a family vacationin hindsight, honestly, i'm MORE surprised it didn't happen sooner. back when i lived with my dad, until i was 10 or so, we used to go sk...
molly ofgeographyMay 14, 20154 minthe time i got robbed at knifepoint (but by a gentleman)i don't know a LOT about robbery but i DO know that you should go into it with a gameplan. so when i was studying in argentina, it was li...
molly ofgeographyFeb 13, 20155 minthe worst email i’ve ever sentthis isn't really a "story" so much as a "PSA about email safety." when i was in undergrad i wrote my thesis on translations of shakespea...
molly ofgeographyFeb 10, 20154 minthe time that PAUL MCCARTNEY gave me a swimming lessoni'm sorry, paul. DISCLAIMER: i have no memory of this story. this is just a story that has been told to me SO MANY TIMES that quite frank...
molly ofgeographyJan 9, 20154 minthe time my mom adopted a wild boar and it all went very badly, as anticipatedlife on the farm is weird and has gone a long way toward preparing me for the weirdness that is adult life. so something that you have to...
molly ofgeographyDec 15, 20145 minthe time my cousin barea accidentally lit her head on fire and now i think she’s hiding somethingshe was stone cold. the woman has ice in her veins. around christmastime a few years ago—let’s say 5 years? maybe 6? i don’t know, some t...