You Think They’re Normal But Your Parents Could Be Hiring Hitmen Under Your VERY NOSE
until the fourth grade, i lived with my dad, brother and sister in gentle suburban massachusetts where i could ride my bike to school. my...
You Think They’re Normal But Your Parents Could Be Hiring Hitmen Under Your VERY NOSE
WASPs Don’t Talk About Their Problems
an open letter to my next-door neighbor: i will never forgive and i will never forget
the time i walked in on a robbery and tried to buy some wine
the time i was a DONUT GOD
the time my highschool boyf and i got stuck on a roof
the time i conquered an oven and almost killed myself with coffee
the time i got stuck on a ski lift and almost ruined a family vacation
the time i got robbed at knifepoint (but by a gentleman)
the worst email i’ve ever sent
the time that PAUL MCCARTNEY gave me a swimming lesson
the time my mom adopted a wild boar and it all went very badly, as anticipated
the time my cousin barea accidentally lit her head on fire and now i think she’s hiding something
the time i accidentally tripped on ambien and tried to fight my own reflection
the time i brought shame on my high school in front of the AP review board
the time i almost died thanks to a piece of luxury furniture
the time my mother left me to die in a fire so that she could rescue five fish, all named jerry
the time i got drunk on a tuesday and threw bar nuts at strangers
the time my friend ginna fell out of the ceiling
the time a slight misunderstanding almost sent me to porn prison