i was a terrible bartender, and everybody knew it. when i lived in spain, i worked as a “bartender” in madrid. i put “bartender” in quotation marks because my boss fernando trusted me with literally nothing but cleaning glasses and occasionally a CLOSELY SUPERVISED mojito. the bar was called “la chocita sueca,” which basically means “the swedish hut,” but can also, as far as i can tell, mean something VERY DIFFERENT and vERY RUDE. this led to a lot of general confusion from t

there is almost nothing i wouldn't do for good food. have i ever told you all about the time my roommate B almost killed a guy about his Super Special B-Only Jam? it was when we were living in argentina, and B was actually not living with me but with this guy we will call hamilton and another guy named……..uh, something. i forget his name, but i know that in high school he was in a screamer band. i think they may have had a song on the radio once, or almost had a song on the r