#familynonsense

molly ofgeography

the time i got stuck on a ski lift and almost ruined a family vacation

in hindsight, honestly, i'm MORE surprised it didn't happen sooner. back when i lived with my dad, until i was 10 or so, we used to go...

molly ofgeography

how to: pack for a family reunion

good news: your family has to love you no matter what. 1. DEFINITELY wait until the very last minute to do everything, including putting...

molly ofgeography

the time that PAUL MCCARTNEY gave me a swimming lesson

i'm sorry, paul. DISCLAIMER: i have no memory of this story. this is just a story that has been told to me SO MANY TIMES that quite...

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molly ofgeography

the time my cousin barea accidentally lit her head on fire and now i think she’s hiding something

she was stone cold. the woman has ice in her veins. around christmastime a few years ago—let’s say 5 years? maybe 6? i don’t know, some...

molly ofgeography

the time my mother left me to die in a fire so that she could rescue five fish, all named jerry

i know my mother loves me. but. so obviously the problem with listening to country music too much is that it is a constant reminder of my...

molly ofgeography

the time i got drunk on a tuesday and threw bar nuts at strangers

i was a terrible bartender, and everybody knew it. when i lived in spain, i worked as a “bartender” in madrid. i put “bartender” in...

molly ofgeography

the time a slight misunderstanding almost sent me to porn prison

the problem with pay-per-view is that you have to pay per view. so here’s a fun story about the first wives club. guess who loves this...